i'm breaking this up because i think it will be less overwhelming this way...
chest x-ray (site of original cancer) is clean. x-ray tech (as per usual) didn't believe me when i said i have *really* long lungs (like a marathon running tuba-player) and had to take an extra picture or two because he cut the bottom off of them the first go round. hopefully a bit more radiation is one of those hair of the dog things, right? somehow i suspect not... anyway, my foobs looked super cool in the x-rays.
standard followup also includes an interview with a psychiatrist. the girl is new this year and i'm fairly certain she's younger than i am, like maybe by a lot. 'but how are you feeeeeling about things?' oh, i feel great lady. i *love* sitting in the clinic watching children be dragged away for chemo/bone marrow tests/shit that i've done and imagining they're my kids, crying in front of strangers. it's awesome. also, it's super cool that i've been clinically depressed for the past 12 years and on medication for as many. i look forward to spending a large portion of my paycheck on therapy, psychiatry and medication. FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. this cancer thing is awesome. 'so it sounds like you're well connected with psych professionals then?' yup. it's PEACHY. so that went well. pffft.
dear celeste, please have danny look at all the moles/freckles/skin tags and any other skin changes at least twice a year. it could be skin cancer from your cancer treatment. love, your oncologist.
'don't you see a doctor that often? can't they do it?' yes, but you see me naked. every single day. you'd be more likely to notice a change than someone who sees me twice a year and thousands of other naked people during that same time frame. 'hrmmm. well, will you look at the moles on my back twice a year?' sure babe, sure.
aaaaand there was an echocardiogram and an ekg. as everyone suspected i have no heart. just darkness. at least when you try and look through a reconstructed foob. the lady had to get creative on angles with the wand (down from the clavicle and up from below my sternum) but eventually got a clear enough picture i guess. i was given a stern warning about colds i can't shake and about coughs that don't go away as they may be signs of heart/lung disease. m'kay. gotcha.