i know, i'm a terrible blogger lately. i've been busy, and worse, good busy and therefore not in the mood to write a whole hell of a lot. i've been more in the mood to read and lay by the pool and take the windows off the wrangler and participate in these last days of school with the kiddos.
s&b is keeping the four of us very busy and we're launching our new packaging next week. i'll be redoing all the photos on the website since we've gotten new molds since i posted pictures last (erm, two or three times over!). we're doing four markets and in about a dozen retail outlets (with two grocery chains on the horizon). we've also been offered an incredible chance to open our own store. it would be a tremendous leap for us and i'll talk about it more as things move along. needless to say it feels like we're moving into a time of tremendous growth and change and fabulousness. i still can't believe this is the same company ben and i started three year ago... i guess in many many ways, it isn't (thank god!)
lorenzo just had his last day of tiny tots today and though he's still the 'baby' in this household he's undeniably growing up. four (!) is just around the corner. miss p has six more days of kindergarden and then is starting summer school. she's suddenly a reader and i can't tell you how exciting this is for me. have i mentioned that i love having school age children? have i mentioned how over the baby phase i am? things are getting so easy. not everything takes 10 bajillion years to do. we can go places and they get in their boosters and stay nearby in stores but are big enough to go ask the bakery department at safeway for their own goddamn complimentary cookies. and they even remember to say please and thank you! our summer is fairly packed with camp and swim lessons and (very) mini vacations and weddings but i'm looking forward to a more relaxed schedule with them. that and getting to sleep past 7:15. ;)
things with d are for the most part domestic bliss. which is to say that after almost three years i still laugh every single time he farts (which is fairly frequently). i have to say that it's taken me almost this long to settle in, to relax and realize, hey, he likes us...he isn't bailing. i'm able to ask for what i need without a tiny frantic voice whispering but what if this pushes him away? we spent a very nice weekend down in carmel with my family and the kids and enjoyed each others' company immensely. seeing him with my family makes me tremendously happy. truthfully, watching lorenzo walk off hand in hand for ice cream with his biological father touches me far less that watching him and d trudge down ocean avenue on the same mission. (oh wait, no that never happens with bk. n/m.)
aaaaaaand, all bloggy roads lead back to bk don't they? moreofthesame moreofthesame moreofthesame. yeah, drinks too much. spends far too little time with the kids. cancels frequently. does meaningless things that look like big gestures to people on the outside (see: tattoo). lies. in other words: moreofthesame. the difference is, they don't care. the kids don't give a damn. a stranger could come and take them swimming once a week and would probably bond with them in a more significant way. parker asks in a blasé way: 'why does he cancel so much? why does he spend the whole time texting when he's with us?' and i answer as honestly as i can: 'i don't know. there's other things he'd rather be doing. this might be how it is always. but you're lucky because you have d and uncle ben and uncle forrest and papa vince and grammy and gigi and popo and jen and SO many other strong amazing men and women who love you 'til the end of the earth and back and will ALWAYS be there for you.' and generally, that's enough to satisfy her until her dad, or some other stranger or familiar comes to take her swimming.