people are always saying you should be yourself, like yourself is this definite thing, like a toaster. like you know what it is even.

i was just browsing the abc website and noticed they have full episodes of my so called life up. remember that show? with claire danes and jared leto? boy, i loved that show. (i think i even had a ripped out picture of jared leto on my wall for several months.) angela always seemed so distraught and moody and just how i thought i wanted to be at 15, even though (or especially because) she didn't really fit in. her life appeared difficult in a romantic sort of way. it seems strange now that there was anything exotic about struggling and being rejected. i guess those struggles and rejections were romantic - simple and fleeting. yearning for things now feels different and somehow more lasting, if slightly less desperate...