yesterday was a downer day in the r sense. most days now i feel free of him emotionally and able to exist as something more that almost divorced. (have i mentioned i will have lapped some of my cousins in the marriage department by winter? for shame!) yesterday i was tired of the cancel/reschedule/cancel/never mind i'll come over and make plans on my cell phone while i'm there - deal. i've been feeling taken advantage of. i'm not the nanny or the grocery store or the storage unit. i'm one HALF not nine-tenths of the parental unit. some days i feel like shaking him and saying it's not fair! i didn't agree to raise our kids so you could party and be the fun parent, ass-face.
but then i saw b and it was easy and comfortable and we talked about food and felines and movies and mental health (don't ask) and cozy little coffee shops with big comfy couches and lots of old books and free wifi and i realized that my revenge (if i were to call it that, which i won't from now on) will be sweet. sweet and organic and chocolate-y. and as it turns out it will be something that i do to better my children and make myself happy because we are good people and we deserve so much goodness and even though our suddenly differently-abled (man down! man down!) family/home may have been the catalyst, it won't have anything to do with r at all.
but then i saw b and it was easy and comfortable and we talked about food and felines and movies and mental health (don't ask) and cozy little coffee shops with big comfy couches and lots of old books and free wifi and i realized that my revenge (if i were to call it that, which i won't from now on) will be sweet. sweet and organic and chocolate-y. and as it turns out it will be something that i do to better my children and make myself happy because we are good people and we deserve so much goodness and even though our suddenly differently-abled (man down! man down!) family/home may have been the catalyst, it won't have anything to do with r at all.