we're swamped getting ready for the salon in sf this coming saturday and i'll likely be busy until that's over. oy. and i have a stack of grading that i've been ignoring...
i had my first appointment with my new psychiatrist today. (i fired my last one 3.5 years ago after she broke client confidentiality with bk in our emergency session 2 days after he left. up until today my ob/gyn has been managing my meds.) the session lasted two hours as it was a full intake appointment. basically i'm looking for someone to manage my medications for the next several years or until i don't need them anymore... i can't remember if i've talked about it before but i've been on antidepressants without (intentional) pause for the past ten years. depression runs deep in my maternal family tree and i don't know that i'll ever be completely free of depression AND antidepressants. the stigma wore off long ago in me and i'm not particularly ashamed or even affected by this. i suspect i'd be more affected if i was too depressed to take care of my kids. ;) anyway, these appointments are always a little unnerving because my degree is in psych and i'm fully aware of what some of the more pointed questions are stabbing at. "ever had periods when you didn't feel like you needed to sleep? periods of promiscuity? excessive spending?" no, i've never been manic... "felt hopeless? desperate?" no, and no suicide attempts either. and these symptoms are all clouded by 10 years of thyroid issues and learning disabilities related to my cancer treatment. it's empowering to be so familiar with your own health/body/mind but on the other hand frustrating. do we have to do this? can't you just fill my prescription/test this blood level/give me this x-ray and let me go home? please?